Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Everything That I Know For Sure About Men


Well, clearly I know nothing about them.  I always thought that women were the more complex of the sexes, and yes, God love us, we love to complicate things, but sheesh, men...what the hell are they thinking???

I dove back into the online dating pond a month ago.  I realized that I did not give it a real try last time.  I didn't post any photos of me, my profiles were sarcastic and angry, and I gave up in a hurry.  So, a month ago I signed up again...better attitude, photos, gentler profile.  The results have honestly been staggering.  I get messaged daily - granted 80% of them I am not interested in at all, but let's cut the crap - who doesn't like that kind of attention?

Through this process, I have observed a few things about men nowadays:

  • They are unwilling to leave the city limits.  Seriously.  I have actually had men go out of their way to message me to say "It's too bad you live so far away."  Have we become such a society of convenience that the idea of driving for an hour to meet a potential mate is so unfathomable?  
  • Chivalry is, it seems, dead.  This goes hand-in-hand with the above.  What happened to men woo-ing women?  Making a little effort?  I'm all for meeting halfway, but I believe the initial effort should be made by the man.  I have a male friend who is also elbows-deep into this online dating thing.  He has been divorced for 5 years now and is terribly miserable.  All he wants is to meet someone.  He recently told me that he has been chatting with a woman from Fernie but that it's "a little far".  I basically ripped him a new one.  I said, "So basically, you want a relationship, but only if it falls in your lap and requires no effort from you whatsoever..."  He actually had the nerve to tell me, "It works both ways!"  I told him to grow a pair and to do something to keep chivalry alive.  Yep, I'm a good friend. 
  • Even though most of them act as though they have it all together, they are really still teenagers trapped in a 40-something's body.  They like boobs, cars, and boobs in cars.  I actually chatted with a guy online who's headline said "Must have food, boobs, and brains"..he later admitted that he really could care less about the brains...or the food....LOL
  • I have no idea, really, what they are they want us to message them first?  Do they think about us throughout the day?  Wonder what it would be like to kiss us?  We all know they are trying to imagine us naked....
If any of you follow me on Twitter you will know the freak-show that I have encountered during this process.  Men (boys) from ages 19-63, a cross-dresser, tattooed face guy (he assures that yes, there is a story behind it.....whew!  Cuz that makes it ok...), couples looking to add a third...seriously, I can't make this shit up.  But once in a while, a face and profile will jump out at me and I take a chance and message them.  In doing this I have been blocked (seriously buddy?), politely brushed-off, ignored, propositioned, and in a couple of instances, actual conversation ensues.  I guess those rose-colored glasses of mine pay off once in a while.
I'm not sure that I will meet my Mr. Right For Me this way, but who knows??  I'm definitely having fun in the meantime.
I'm still in the dark about the male species....but it's more fun to feel your way around sometimes, isn't it. ;0)


  1. Jason tried to say he didn't want to come into the city then came in to see me, on the North side, the next day. This makes me appreciate him that much more. He was willing to travel, he will help anyone with anything he is capable of, He still acts like a teenager sometimes but I have taken that as an opportunity to know when I need to lighten up a bit.
    It will be fun Jodi!

  2. Yes, which just goes to prove that the right ones will make the effort... ;)